What I've Learned So Far

When I began sharing my journey, I said I would be honest. So far the journey has been slow but steady; but in the past two weeks I have experienced a set-back. I have gained a few pounds and I feel I must share not only my success, but also my miss-steps.

I have no one to blame but myself. I have indulged, I haven't exercised as often; in general, I've been lazy!

What I've learned through this whole process though, is how strong I really am and how far I have come since the beginning.

When I weighed last week and saw a gain, I was truly angry with myself. The rest of my day was a disaster, as far as self control goes; let's just say, I didn't have any. I literally threw in the towel, but only for the day.

By the end of the day I was still angry at myself, angrier because of my loss of control, but more determined than ever to get where I'm headed.

I can't explain it, but I just know, that I know, that I know that I will only fail if I don't get back up, dust myself off and get my head straight again.

I know that with God's help I can do anything I put my mind to.

So, with all that said, I'm scrapping a couple of bad weeks and starting fresh.

I've learned that giving into a craving and having it in the house leads to a binge for me. I just can't handle it. If I'm going to have a treat, it needs to be a serving size and that's it, no left overs, no seconds. If it's here, I will eat it.

I've learned that I need to exercise. Even if it's just for 15 minutes, I need some form of exercise everyday.  It not only helps me with weight loss, it helps with my mood. I'm a much happier, relaxed person when I exercise.

So, I've stumbled, I've taken a step back, and now I'm dusting myself off and I'm back on track. I hope that by sharing my journey, the good, bad and the ugly, that I will encourage someone else who is fighting the same battle.

I would love to hear from you. Feel free to comment and share your struggles, successes or tips!

Till next time, God bless!! :)

Walking, Weigh-Ins, etc...

Walking

I have finally started walking.  Not only have I started, I'm being consistent.  I have had the "Walk Away The Pounds Express - Advanced Walk - 3 Miles" DVD for a very long time.  Last week I finally put it in the player and walked.  It's set up as a kind of power walk and you can walk one, two or three miles.  It incorporates kick backs, knee lifts, side steps and some arm movements for upper body.

At present, I am walking one mile.  Last week I walked three days.  This week my goal is to walk at least four days.  This week I also added some upper body toning, in hopes of getting rid of my flabby arms.

Up until now, I have been exercising, but not as aggressively.  I was doing leg lifts, crunches and wall push ups.  I was being consistent, but I knew I needed something better that would get my heart pumping.  So, I'm proud of myself for finally getting started.


Weigh-in

My last weigh-in was a bit frustrating and uncertain.

Our scales are digital and we have had them for longer than I can remember.  For several weeks now they have been out of whack; not wanting to come on and very slow to read.  Even after replacing the batteries, they didn't seem to be working properly.  So, after some research, we bought a new set.

The problem is, the new scales weighed me heavier than my old scales (1.7 pounds).  Now, I'm certain they are more accurate and that's great, but what I'm not certain of is whether I actually gained weight or not. Regardless, I recorded my new heavier weight into my weight journal.

I won't lie to you, I wasn't happy to have to record a gain.  In fact, at first I was really upset; just ask my husband.  He suffers from my poor moods, but he's also one of my biggest supporters and is always quick to encourage and remind me of how far I've come.

I finally decided that it just doesn't matter.  This is my journey.  There will be ups and downs.  What matters is that when I have those downs, I don't stay down.

I wallowed for about three or four hours; I'm human.  But then I told myself to shake it off and suck it up.  I'm not the same girl I was a year ago, or even six months ago.  That girl could have easily thrown in the towel and binged on a bag of Oreos.

This new me is determined to keep moving forward.  No matter how many times I fall down, I will get back up.  As I've said before, this is no quick fix.  This is a life long journey and I've got miles to go, but I'm getting closer everyday.


Till next time, God bless!
#mandigirllosingit #amandaglass

Progress

Down 31 pounds and feeling great.  I can't tell you how much better I feel.  I'm so excited about the progress I've made so far.  I have a ways to go, but I know I will get there. 

There have been so many times I wanted to throw in the towel.  And, I'm sure there are probably going to be days ahead of me that I will feel the same way, but I'm determined to keep going.  

I know I have said this before, but it's not about looking better, that's definitely a bonus, it's about getting healthy. 

The hardest part of this whole journey has been changing my mind.  Learning to eat right/less is only part of the battle.  The majority of the battle has taken place in my mind and it's still going on.  I'm pretty sure it will be a life long process.



Some of the things I'm eating right now:

• Mixed Vegetables, steamed with I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Spray and Season Salt - 0 points (Broccoli, Carrots & Cauliflower are my favorite at the moment.)
• 100 Calorie Whipped Greek Yoplait Yogurt - 2 points (The Tropical is my favorite flavor.)
• Skinny Cow Dark Chocolate Blissful Truffle Bars - 3 points 
• Skinny Cow Salted Caramel Pretzel Ice Cream Bar - 4 points

Frustrated

The past couple of weeks have been frustrating.  After losing weight very steadily every week for a month; all of a sudden I've hit a plateau.  I really didn't expect to hit one so soon!

Last week's weigh-in showed no loss, no gain.  I wasn't happy, but I didn't get worried.  But when this week's weigh-in showed a slight gain, I just wanted to cry.  

I have been counting my points religiously, I haven't been using all my flex points, and I have even been more active.  I'm mystified as to why I would gain.  

Normally, a disappointment like this would set off a binge, but I am so determined to get healthy this time.  There's so much more on the line now than just losing weight to look better.  I have decided that I'm worth it.  I deserve to be healthy, to feel better, to have more energy; so I'm not giving up!

So, I will keep on keeping on, putting one foot in front of the other.  I will keep researching new, healthy foods/recipes to try.  I will share the good stuff (I promise to do better).  Keep an eye out for a couple of new recipes coming soon to www.whatscookingwithmandigirl.blogspot.com.

Until next week...God bless!!

 

This Is Me

This is me.  This picture was taken in late June while I was on vacation with my family.  I was miserable.  I couldn't walk and breathe at the same time.

This vacation was a wake up call for me.  I had to do something to change my health.  I did not want to go on being this way.  There were a couple of moments during this vacation that I cried because of how uncomfortable I was in my own body.

I haven't always been this heavy but  I have always struggled with my weight.  When I was about 14 - 15 years old I had reached 200 pounds. That's way too much weight for someone who is only a hair over five foot tall. I decided then to make a change.  I started counting calories and exercising and I managed to lose 70 pounds over the next year.

I kept the weight off for the most part (it was a constant struggle) until I was married.

When I was pregnant with my son I gained 40 pounds.  When he was born he weighed ten pounds and before I left the hospital I had lost 27 pounds.  I lost the rest of the baby weight before returning to work, but I was still a little heavier than I wanted to be.

My son was about two years old when I started Weight Watchers online.  I started losing at a pretty steady pace and was feeling a lot better about myself.  Then something went wrong.

I was dead on my feet.  I was so tired and sleepy (me the insomniac) all the time; all I wanted to do was sleep.  My hair started falling out, my skin broke out, my fingernails were splitting and chipping, and I started gaining weight quickly.  I gained 30 pounds in a month!  I thought I was dying.

I made an appointment and went to see my doctor.  After running some tests, he discovered  that my thyroid had basically quit working.  I have been taking medication for hypothyroidism since that day.

Losing the weight was much harder after that.  It seemed I had to work much harder and it came off very slowly.  I battled with the scales, up and down, up and down.  I eventually just gave up.  I was tired of fighting.

You know what happened then?  I gained more weight.

That brings me to the present.  Here I am, not the heaviest I've ever been, but way too heavy for my small stature and miserable in my own skin.  I'm being gut-wrenchingly honest here.  I don't normally talk about something this personal to me in this open a manner.  My weight is a very personal and embarrassing issue to me.

I have lost four pounds since I returned from vacation.  I'm eating less and moving more.  I'm trying to make positive healthy changes in my life.  I have a long way to go before I reach my goal but I'm more determined than ever to get there.

I have decided to write about this journey because I know I'm not the only person fighting this battle.  I hope that writing about it will help me stay on track.  Maybe it will help you too.  I welcome your encouragement, tips, or even questions (no haters please).

God Bless...
 

Update

Well people, I'm not doing so good on the diet front.  I rejoined Weight Watchers, but I have managed to gain weight, not lose.  I am very discouraged and down on myself at the moment.  I just can't seem to get my momentum going in the right direction.

No fear, though, I am not giving up by any means.  This week I am doing much better and I am determined to stick to my goal.  I knew starting out that this was going to be a hard road to travel and I told you all that I would be honest about my struggles.

To be honest, I haven't posted in a while because I am so disappointed in myself and I didn't want everyone to know that I haven't made any progress.  But, I feel like if I don't let you know and I don't admit the truth, then I will continue to hide my head in the sand.  So, hopefully this update will give me the kick in the butt I need to get my momentum heading in the right direction.

So, good or bad, I will be giving an update on Tuesday, which is the day I have to weigh in.  I know I'm not alone in this struggle and I hope that I can encourage others battling this same issue.

Till Tuesday....