How Many Times Can I Start Over?

I hate how hard it is to lose weight. The struggle to gain control of my self destructive behavior is a daily battle with myself that is never ending. A battle that I have fought for the better part of my life. I have started over so many times and I hate to admit that I've had to start over again just in the past week.

I'm so tired of starting over. I'm tired of watching the scale go up and down. For once I would love to see it consistently going down. When I think of all the times I have lost 30, 50, 70 pounds just to gain it back I could just cry and then kick myself.

I don't know why, but this time in my life seems to be different. It's so much harder than it's ever been before and I'm heavier than ever. I feel the mountain in front of me is too high to climb. Most days I just want to stay in bed under the covers where no one can see what a failure I am. I feel defeated before my feet ever hit the floor.

I'm not trying to be a downer, I'm just being real. I need to vent. Struggling everyday just to put one foot in front of the other is so frustrating.

Quitting is not an option. There may be days that don't go as planned and I may have to keep starting over every day, but I refuse to stop trying.  I'm praying that a "never say die" attitude will eventually take root in my mind. It's going to take a lot of talking to myself and praying.

Lately I've been weak in my prayer life. No excuses, just laziness, I'm ashamed to say. I know when I'm in tune with God that things are better all around.

Things are fixing to change. I know I can do this if I get my head straight and stay focused on the goal. I'm going to continue with Weight Watchers for the time being. I know it will work if I work it. I really do like the new Freestyle program.

I'm praying that I can turn my attitude around and start believing what I'm preaching. Say a prayer for me. Feel free to comment with encouragement or share any tips or recipes you may have. No negativity please.

Till next time, God bless! :)

More Tips and Facts to Aid Weight Loss

Did You Know?

Getting Enough Sleep can aid in weight loss.  Aim for seven to eight hours per night.  Going to bed and waking up at the same time everyday will help train your body clock - which will make it easier to go to sleep at night.  I personally do not get enough sleep.  I have suffered with insomnia since I was 15 years old.  I just wonder what would change if I did get sufficient sleep.

Stress can make you fat.  Secreting too much of the stress hormone cortisol can increase appetite (the body is trying to attain energy to manage the crisis).  Cortisol causes the extra weight to settle around your stomach, and fat around the belly is linked with heart attacks and strokes.  Exercise is the best cure for stress. Exercise releases endorphins, improves your mood, helps you sleep better and can clear the mind of worries.

Tomato Juice in place of your sports drink can help
post work-out inflammation.

Protein rich meals prevent the secretion of the hunger hormone ghrelin and stimulate the release of the satiety hormone peptide YY.










Social Networking temporarily causes you to feel more connected to friends and family and gives your self-esteem a boost.  Unfortunately, there is a down side.  It decreases self-control.  One study showed that people who browsed for five minutes were more likely to choose an unhealthy snack after, than those who spent the same amount of time scanning a news site.  Don't worry, there's no need to stop surfing altogether - just stay away when your hungry, since that is when our will power is at it's lowest.

Eating With Chopsticks makes a meal an event, slows you down and helps prevent overeating.








Getting Off Your Bottom for about one additional hour a day can decrease stress, heighten your mood, energy, focus and productivity.

Finding My Power

Someone shared the following quote on Facebook today and I have made it my new motto:

"You've always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself."

Glinda in The Wizard of Oz

When I read the above quote today something clicked inside my head.  I have always had the power inside of me to change my health for the better.  I just had to believe it.  And nothing is more empowering than progress.  As of today, I can report that I have lost two more pounds bringing my total loss to six pounds since returning home from vacation.  

This new journey is not easy; but what is that old saying?  "Nothing worth having ever came easy."

Getting a handle on my eating habits has been easier than increasing my activity levels.  My biggest problem is lack of energy.  At the moment I am really battling my insomnia.  No sleep equals one very sluggish woman.  However, I am aware that regular exercise will produce more energy and boost positive emotions; so I'm going to start putting one foot in front of the other and pushing through.  Hopefully my sleeping will improve as well.

Speaking of exercise, I promised that I would keep you all apprised of my Zumba experience.  I was very optimistic and excited about trying it.  But I really should have considered how terribly uncoordinated I am before I ordered the DVD.  I suffered a temporary lapse in judgement; I forgot that I can barely walk and chew gum at the same time.  That being said, I'm not giving up.  I'm just going to move and try to have fun at the same time.  Like I've said before, if I don't like it, I won't do it.

Before I go, I want to share a few tips/tricks that I am finding helpful.  Maybe they will work for you too.

• Munch on Crushed Ice:  This keeps me from looking for something to eat between meals.  Added benefit; I'm upping my water intake.
• Brush Your Teeth or Chew Minty Sugar Free Gum:  Brushing my teeth or chewing minty sugar free gum will temporarily cause foods/treats to taste bad.  
• My Fitness Pal:  As I mentioned in my earlier post, at http://www.myfitnesspal.com you can sign-up for a free account and journal your meals, exercise, and progress.  I can't recommend this tool enough.  It is essential for me to keep track of my calories so that I don't get off course.

It is my hope that sharing my journey will encourage others who are struggling.  I am by no means a professional. There are going to be ups and downs and I am going to make mistakes along the way.  But I feel like I have finally found my power.  I encourage you to search within yourself and find yours too.  It's there, you just have to believe it!

Until next time, God bless!!!  :)

Little Victories

I lost four pounds this week - whoop, whoop!!!  Everybody do the happy dance.  I know I did when I saw the numbers on the scale.

I have finally found my groove again.  I started swimming laps this week.  I have only been able to do ten and that has been a great challenge.  This old girl isn't used to that much exertion yet.  I had to take more than a few breathing breaks during those ten laps.  It feels good though to be making an effort and a change.

Today, when I did those laps I was able to take fewer breathing breaks.  I took that as a sign that I'm building my endurance and soon I will have to add some laps.

I also made some adjustments to my eating.  I am trying to eat less.  I haven't put myself on a real restrictive diet.  I don't do well with eliminating foods.  My main goal at this point in time is to eat less and move more.

I think the fact that the scale showed a four pound loss this week indicates that this plan is working for me.  I am really encouraged by this small victory, which to me seems bigger than it probably does to those of you reading this.  I have been struggling for so long to get my mind back in this place.  The place where I feel I am in control.

I also ordered a Zumba DVD.  I just received it in the mail yesterday and I am looking forward to checking it out.  My hope is that it will be a fun form of exercise that I can switch up with my swimming workouts.  It's important for me to find exercise that I will enjoy.  If I don't like it, I won't do it.  It's just that simple.

I'm really excited and I want to encourage anyone out there who is struggling to just hang in there.  Try something new and don't beat yourself up.

I'll let ya'll know how the Zumba goes!

God bless...