Craving

So, I've started reading the book, "Made to Crave," by Lysa Terkeurst. Made to Crave: Satisfying Your Deepest Desire with God, Not Food  So far, it's making a lot of sense to me.  The gist I'm getting so far is that I need to transfer my cravings for unhealthy food to a craving for God.

There is a helpful review at the end of the chapters that helps you answer questions about yourself.  I'm finding it very insightful.  I will let you know as I progress through the book how it goes.

I've prayed, actually pleaded, in the past that God would take away my desires to eat unhealthy food, eat when I'm not hungry, eat just because everyone else is eating, eat when I'm happy, eat when I'm sad, eat because I'm nervous, eat when I'm angry, eat just because it's there, and on and on and on.  I think you get the idea, this list could go on for days.  What I haven't tried is praying in the midst of the temptation.  It's usually after a full blown binge or late at night after a day of feeling really bad about myself for having no self-control or just after trying on 10 different items from my closet that are too tight.

So, I'm going to try it.  I'm going to start praying in the midst of the storm.  When I feel the cravings for that candy bar that's screaming at me while I'm in the check-out line at the store, I"m going to pray.  Before meal prayers are now going to include, "help me to know when I'm full and I need to stop eating."  I'm even going to pray when I grocery shop that God will help me to resist buying unhealthy food.

I'll let you know how it goes.  As always, pray for me, I'm going to need it.

Here I Go Again!

Well, needless to say, it's been a while since my last blog.  Truth be told, I've been too ashamed and embarrassed to post anything because I have felt like a complete failure.

In the past months I have allowed myself to get back to within three pounds of my all time high.  It's humiliating and frustrating and so hard to face.  Here I am though, facing it again.  I am laying it all out again and starting over - again!

I'm committing to myself that I will strive everyday to live a healthier lifestyle.  This includes; eating, exercising, and mental/spiritual well being.

As in the past, it's not going to be easy and I'm sure I am going to have set-backs and there are going to be a lot of bad days, but I am never going to give up.  I have to do this, not just because I need to, but because I want to.  To be healthy for myself and for my family.  I want to make the changes that will not only impact myself, but my family, especially my son.  I see him heading down the same path and I don't want him to suffer the way I have.  I want him to get control of it early.

So, wish me luck and pray for me.  I'm gonna need it!